Microsoft word - 316b, thoughtful food, april 28, 2004.doc

Thoughtful Food

By Tad Bartimus
A while back my husband announced during breakfast that the foods we'd been
eating together for 30 years were killing him. Iron skillet in hand, I instinctively
replied, "Then you cook."
Once we got past the "It's your fault" "No, it's your fault" phase, we compromised: throw away the junk food and start over. We purged the pantry, cleaned the refrigerator and made a grocery list, eliminating every processed product on it. At the checkout, our bill was one-third less than the previous shopping trip and the only cans in the sack were Campbell's tomato soup, without which I cannot live. I've spent most of my life using maple syrup and real vanilla to express my love to family and friends. When asked my favorite food, I always replied, "butter." When called to account by Pritikin lovers, I always pooh-poohed their disapproval with, "What harm can a little barbecue sauce do?" or "A teensy piece of chocolate cake won't hurt you." Secretly, I knew I'd eventually have to change my attitude about food, but I got irrationally angry about setting aside lifelong habits. After all, I'm a good cook. Preparing and serving food is inextricably linked to my sense of self; compliments from my family and guests boost my self-esteem. Thinking back on my best times, they often centered on shared meals. My earliest memory is of being in my grandmother's kitchen as she made noodles for my family's elaborate Sunday dinners, with her encouraging me to grab handfuls of flour out of the big bin and help her knead the dough. There's even a picture of the mess I made -- Grandma and I are laughing. Meals also offer opportunities for civility in an increasingly rude world. Good food served on pretty dishes set on an ironed tablecloth, with real silverware and linen napkins, is a way of saying, "See all this trouble I went to for you? This is proof of how much I care." Psychologists believe families who share at least one meal a day forge stronger bonds. When my husband and I don't make time to eat together our communication suffers. I invite guests to arrive early for dinner so we can visit in the kitchen as I chop and stir. But I've finally admitted to myself that if what we eat conveys love and friendship, I'd rather give my loved ones healthy food to help them live longer. Just because we're fortunate to have the option of taking cholesterol-lowering statin drugs such as Zocor, Pravachol, Lipitor and Mevacor doesn't mean we shouldn't break bad habits. If you were coming to dinner at my house today you'd get steamed sugar snap peas instead of potatoes au gratin, baked fish instead of beef stroganoff, a green salad instead of mayonnaise-based coleslaw, and fresh fruit instead of chocolate mousse. This connoisseur of creamy casseroles, spaghetti and tapioca pudding has become a tofu queen. I knew that when we came home from the store with soymilk and green beans instead of Doritos and Oreos this was not just a passing fad, but a lifestyle change. In the past six months, I've lost 18 pounds, my husband 19. My joints still creak, but I now walk three miles at a stretch, instead of one. I read labels with the same intensity as a John Grisham novel; too many calories or carbohydrates and the product goes back on the shelf. Grabbing lunch at a McDonald's or Subway, I go for the salad or the wrap instead of the double cheeseburger with giant fries. And for the record, my self-esteem is thriving. Log on to www.tadbartimus.com to order Tad's new book, "War Torn," share your thoughts, read great stories and visit with her. You can also write to Tad c/o The Women Syndicate, P.O. Box 10169, Columbia, Mo. 65205. 2004 by The Women Syndicate

Source: http://tadbartimus.com/graphics/316B_Apr_28_2004.pdf